10 Random Poker Quotes

• "If the flop don't fit, you must aquit" -Matt Thornton, Dayton, Ohio
• The only way to win is to play. Unfortunetly, it is also the only way to loose.
• Nixon financed his first political campaign with money he won playing poker against his fellow naval officers.
• If only I'd read, "Winning at Internet Poker For Dummies." 'Til now, I never thought I qualified.
• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• People who play poker should also try playing with sock puppets, or, in a more casual event, training ferrets. I hope this pleases fellow pokerites like it pleases me, daily. WOW im wet.
• Please screen your these quotes, most of the crap people submit here don't classify as poker quotes at all, they just express how badly those persons misunderstand the game of poker or how proud they are that they understand elemntry concepts such as "counting outs" or "pot odds", no one cares jerks
• This site pulls more flushes than a public restroom!!!
• "It's always good to get a nice dick-suckin before a tournament...it calms the senses." Alex Powers
• I cried because I had no draw, until I met a man with no pair.