10 Random Poker Quotes

• Never educate a stupid poker player.
• "What've you got, Layne?" "You BEAT." Final table banter between Layne Flack and Mike "The Mouth" Matusow. $ 6,000 No Limit Hold'em Final Day 2004 Ultimatebet.com Poker Classic Radisson Aruba Resort & Casino, Palm Beach
• "You gotta know when to hold 'em, know when to fold 'em." -Kenny Rogers
• If you cant spot the fish in the first ten minutes, you are the fish.
• "Hooks (pair of Jacks) are for Fish. You've got to flop 'em, fold 'em, or fornicate 'em." Johnnie Moss
• The one who bets the most wins; cards just break ties.
• Sex is like poker. It feels better to go all in. --Jarod Kintz
• Hold em' is like sex... everyone thinks they are great at it, but most people dont know what the hell they are doing.
• Homer: Your mother has this crazy idea that gambling is wrong. Even though they say it's okay in the Bible. Lisa: Really? Where? Homer: Eh, somewhere in the back.
• Two cowboys at table. One suddenly plunges a dagger through the hand of the other player, pinning the hand to the table. Then he says to his wounded opponent, "Sir, if that is not an ace of spades hidden beneath your hand, then I owe you an apology."