10 Random Poker Quotes

• Always play hands where both hole cards are different suits. It doubles the possibility of hitting a flush. Anon.
• When I was young, I heard that all you need is a chip and chair. Now that I am old, I realize that they weren't talking about tortilla chips.
• Deal 'em, and read 'em. Ralph Malph
• Playing poker for play money is like going to a strip club for the food. -UncleWaldo
• No Limit Hold'em - Hours of boredom followed by moments of sheer terror.
• I couldn't bet it, so I gave my Aunt $2 to make a bet for me. She didn't want me to be disappointed by losing my first bet, so she bought a show ticket. The horse won. It's been 40 years, I still havn't spoken to her again. --Gary Carson
• How do you get a professional poker player off your porch? Pay him for the pizza.
• Hold em' is like sex... everyone thinks they are great at it, but most people dont know what the hell they are doing.
• "Take my advice and do as you please" - TJ Cloutier
• "never count your money when your sitting at the table, there will be time enough for counting, when the dealings done."