10 Random Poker Quotes

• you cannot have everything....where would you put it. (steven wright)
• I couldn't bet it, so I gave my Aunt $2 to make a bet for me. She didn't want me to be disappointed by losing my first bet, so she bought a show ticket. The horse won. It's been 40 years, I still havn't spoken to her again. --Gary Carson
• People who play poker should also try playing with sock puppets, or, in a more casual event, training ferrets. I hope this pleases fellow pokerites like it pleases me, daily. WOW im wet.
• Most poker players agree, having sex is much akin to playing a game - both require a good hand.
• Fish don't eat Nutz!
• The problem with slowplaying the nuts is that there might be somebody else slowplaying a hand they only think is the nuts. -Gary Carson
• For all you probability freaks, remember to consider the probability that an opponent is lying. Generally, liars dig holes and keep on lying, at least in the short run, as they try to climb out. Adjust your math prowess accordingly. Tells are paramount, as much or more as your calculating brain is. Poker becomes super-multi-variable when the psychological realm is joined with that already beautiful world of card probabilities. -- a mathematician
• I've raised with cards less attractive than what's in my toilet after I took a dump in it. - Gus Hansen
• You can't lead a horse to water, but a Donkey will follow you all the way to the River.
• All I wanted in my divorce settlement was my computer - Pokerroom.com