10 Random Poker Quotes

• "if you riffle shuffle a standard deck exactly 9 times the cards will return to its original position as it were prior to the 9 riffle shuffles."
• "Never go broke in an unraised pot" -T.J. Cloutier
• if u play for the thrill u are ill
• Think of how stupid the median poker player is. By definition, half of them are dumber than that.
• (after a particularly bad beat) "that was a terrible call" "it's called gambling" "no it's called really sucking at life especially poker and trying to throw your money away because your life is useless and you have been pondering suicide for the last week but getting lucky enough to keep it"
• Never educate a stupid poker player.
• How do you get a professional poker player off your porch? Pay him for the pizza.
• "you got to know when to holdem, know when to fold em, know when to walk away, know when to run..."
• "Just play every hand, you can't miss them all." -Sammy Farha's reply to, "How does he do it?"
• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.