10 Random Poker Quotes

• Sex is good, but poker lasts longer.
• If you don't want to get beat on the river, don't get in a hand with me. -- Dan Nelson
• "In the Poker Game of Life women are the rake, they are the ______ rake." -Worm
• "There are few things that are so unpardonably neglected in our country as poker. The upper class knows very little about it. Now and then you find ambassadors who have sort of a general knowledge of the game, but the ignorance of the people is fearful. Why, I have known clergymen, good men, kind-hearted, liberal, sincere, and all that, who did not know the meaning of a "flush". It is enough to make one ashamed of the species." --Mark Twain
• "So, what did you have?" "A pair...of balls."
• Don't look at when a player sucks out on you with a trash hand as a loss. Think of it as an investment that will be returned with interest.
• Always play hands where both hole cards are different suits. It doubles the possibility of hitting a flush. Anon.
• "Not all trappers wear 'coon-skin hats."
• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• The next best thing to playing poker and winning, is playing poker and losing.