10 Random Poker Quotes

• Asked why he played in a game known to be crooked, a player replied, "But it's the only game in town."
• God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffible game of his own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players, to being involved in an obscure and complex version of poker in a pitch dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a dealer who won't tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time. --Gaiman and Pratchett's "Good Omens"
• I can't raise it up. - Cow Jacobs
• See AA before the flop is like a smile from the girl of your dreams, see AA lose to a pour hand on the river feels like the same chick just gave you a bad case of blue balls
• You can't lead a horse to water, but a Donkey will follow you all the way to the River.
• "never count your money when your sitting at the table, there will be time enough for counting, when the dealings done."
• If you play 69, always bet on the come.
• Think of how stupid the median poker player is. By definition, half of them are dumber than that.
• Most poker players agree, having sex is much akin to playing a game - both require a good hand.
• "The poker player learns that sometimes both science and common sense are wrong; that the bumblebee can fly; that, perhaps, one should never trust an expert; that there are more things in heaven and earth than are dreamt of by those with an academic bent." -- David Mamet