10 Random Poker Quotes

• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• Darwin takes a toll on the worst poker players because they lose money, Darwin takes a toll on average poker players because they don't make money and they will never be a great poker players, Darwin takes the greatest toll though, on the greatest poker players, because they could be doing something greater.
• "It's always good to get a nice dick-suckin before a tournament...it calms the senses." Alex Powers
• I have found that when my reasoning for making a call amounts to, "Aww, fuck it." it is usually the wrong move.
• some call cheating immoral, but then again, it's immoral to let a sucker keep his money.
• "Percentage players die broke too, Burt." -Fast Eddie Felson "The Hustler"
• Liquor up front, poker in the rear
• "In low limit hold em' deception plays a less significant role. Either someone is already looking at that hand or will call out of curiousity." ---Lee Jones
• (after a particularly bad beat) "that was a terrible call" "it's called gambling" "no it's called really sucking at life especially poker and trying to throw your money away because your life is useless and you have been pondering suicide for the last week but getting lucky enough to keep it"
• If it wasn't for luck, I'd win every hand.