10 Random Poker Quotes

• Remember these three simple words and you'll never go broke........ "Stick em Up!"
• If you don't want to get beat on the river, don't get in a hand with me. -- Dan Nelson
• I've noticed something funny ... the more I practice, the luckier I get. -- Jack Nicklaus
• "Listen, here's the thing. If you can't spot the sucker in the first half hour at the table, then you ARE the sucker." - Mike McDermott, "Rounders"
• "You can shear a sheep many times; you can skin it only once." -- Amarillo Slim
• Someone on here said that "poker is for fat American losers". That sounds a lot like the ramblings of a foriegn homosexual who's busy scratching a broke ass.
• Most poker players agree, having sex is much akin to playing a game - both require a good hand.
• "No river, no fish."
• Son, when a man bets you that the jack of spades will rise out of the dwck and squirt water in your ear: son, don't take that bet, for, as sure as eggs is eggs, you'll end up with a wet ear.
• "Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died." -- Steven Wright