10 Random Poker Quotes

• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• Got married to a hand, and discovered I got set up with a she-male.
• Nobody knows where the hobo goes when it snows.
• "In the Poker Game of Life women are the rake, they are the ______ rake." -Worm
• Acey Deucy Never Leucy --Phil Hellmuth
• In order to live, you must be willing to die - Amir Vahedi
• I play like a mullet: tight up front and loose in the back.
• "It's hard work. Gambling. Playing poker. Don't let anyone tell you different. Think about what it's like sitting at a poker table with people whose only goal is to cut your throat, take your money, and leave you out back talking to yourself about what went wrong inside. That probably sounds harsh. But that's the way it is at the poker table. If you don't believe me, then you're the lamb that's going off to the slaughter." Stu Unger, three-time WSOP Champion
• when you win its got to make a difference when you lose its got to hurt.
• I couldn't bet it, so I gave my Aunt $2 to make a bet for me. She didn't want me to be disappointed by losing my first bet, so she bought a show ticket. The horse won. It's been 40 years, I still havn't spoken to her again. --Gary Carson