10 Random Poker Quotes

• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• This site pulls more flushes than a public restroom!!!
• Ive always like the quote, "Who needs balls when you got the nuts!!!"
• I don't really mind getting bad beats. Of course, 9 times out of 10, my superior cards will win. But that 1 time in 10 that someone catches lucky cards and beats me, I don't get mad. Because each of the next 9 times they think they can catch something adds another inch to my television.
• Poker is like sex - everyone thinks that they are the best at it but few actually know what they are doing - Layne Flack
• Always play hands where both hole cards are different suits. It doubles the possibility of hitting a flush. Anon.
• "It's always good to get a nice dick-suckin before a tournament...it calms the senses." Alex Powers
• Got married to a hand, and discovered I got set up with a she-male.
• A pair of Aces with a low kicker is like a chick without nipples... -doyle brunson, circa 1986
• Take me to the river. Wash me in the water.