10 Random Poker Quotes

• Two cowboys at table. One suddenly plunges a dagger through the hand of the other player, pinning the hand to the table. Then he says to his wounded opponent, "Sir, if that is not an ace of spades hidden beneath your hand, then I owe you an apology."
• When I was young, I heard that all you need is a chip and chair. Now that I am old, I realize that they weren't talking about tortilla chips.
• Think of how stupid the average poker player is. By definition, half of them are dumber than that.
• what is a river if there is no river to draw to water
• "Poker is 100% skill, 50% luck" - Phil Hellmuth
• If you could lose all of your money again... what would you have done differently?
• how do you know when simon trumper has just got lucky? a bit of his hair falls out.
• "Losers always whine about their best. Winners go home and fuck the prom queen."
• "Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died." -- Steven Wright
• I guess if luck wasn't involved, i'd win every tournament -Phil Helmuth