10 Random Poker Quotes

• Remember these three simple words and you'll never go broke........ "Stick em Up!"
• "Never say 'Whoa' to a mud puddle" -- Anonymous $4-to-go NL A-5 Lowball Table, Cameo Club Palo Alto CA, 1977
• "If the flop don't fit, you must aquit" -Matt Thornton, Dayton, Ohio
• God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffible game of his own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players, to being involved in an obscure and complex version of poker in a pitch dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a dealer who won't tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time. --Gaiman and Pratchett's "Good Omens"
• How can I miss the flop so bad that I don't even have a straight draw? -Jdoe
• The best thing about that hand was I wasn't in it
• "First you're a champ, then you're a chimp, then you're a chump." [I was told this was a quote from Phil Hellmuth]
• Liquor up front, poker in the rear
• Poker is like petting a cat, you need some hands.
• Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. — Steven Wright