10 Random Poker Quotes

• You have to piss with the dick you have
• I can't raise it up. - Cow Jacobs
• Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. — Steven Wright
• I'd rather be good than lucky, I'd rather be lucky than lose...
• Sex is good, but poker lasts longer.
• Whaddya think you're playing against- an empty chair?
• Darwin takes a toll on the worst poker players because they lose money, Darwin takes a toll on average poker players because they don't make money and they will never be a great poker players, Darwin takes the greatest toll though, on the greatest poker players, because they could be doing something greater.
• God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffible game of his own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players, to being involved in an obscure and complex version of poker in a pitch dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a dealer who won't tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time. --Gaiman and Pratchett's "Good Omens"
• I play like a mullet: tight up front and loose in the back.
• The best thing about that hand was I wasn't in it