10 Random Poker Quotes

• When I was young, I heard that all you need is a chip and chair. Now that I am old, I realize that they weren't talking about tortilla chips.
• How can I miss the flop so bad that I don't even have a straight draw? -Jdoe
• Play like a cunt, get fucked like one!
• Most poker players agree, having sex is much akin to playing a game - both require a good hand.
• Poker - love the pain or play checkers. - MoeSyzslak
• Take me to the river. Wash me in the water.
• Why not, when some because there are three.
• (after a particularly bad beat) "that was a terrible call" "it's called gambling" "no it's called really sucking at life especially poker and trying to throw your money away because your life is useless and you have been pondering suicide for the last week but getting lucky enough to keep it"
• "First you're a champ, then you're a chimp, then you're a chump." [I was told this was a quote from Phil Hellmuth]
• Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. — Steven Wright