10 Random Poker Quotes

• Most of these quotes are abysmal and submitted by the sort of idiots who fill the partypoker chatbox with words like 'phuktard'
• I played poker with a real 10 last night, however on a slow night she only charges 5!
• "Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died." -- Steven Wright
• "That's the best I ever misread a hand." Unknown NL holdem tourney player at Taj Mahal, December 2003, after going all in on the flop, mistakenly believing he had a flush, but rivering a flush anyway
• "never count your money when your sitting at the table, there will be time enough for counting, when the dealings done."
• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• I can't raise it up. - Cow Jacobs
• Nobody would play the game if the best hand always won. -Will Schwarz
• When I play badly, I lose fast. When I play well, I lose slowly. In a tournament, the net result is the same: I LOSE! - RH 11-6-05
• Darwin takes a toll on the worst poker players because they lose money, Darwin takes a toll on average poker players because they don't make money and they will never be a great poker players, Darwin takes the greatest toll though, on the greatest poker players, because they could be doing something greater.