10 Random Poker Quotes

• Right now I only play online poker. If I ever play live poker, raise preflop with a good hand, get called by someone with a 52 who hits a straight, I am walking over to that person to knock out his teeth. Congratulations you idiot.
• Poker is for fat, American losers.
• "You will show your poker greatness by the hands you fold, not the hands you play." -Dan Reed
• "never count your money when your sitting at the table, there will be time enough for counting, when the dealings done."
• I have two small pair.....8's and 8's.
• People who play poker often wear raw hide.
• Any two cards can lose... and they usually do.
• "No river, no fish."
• "There are few things that are so unpardonably neglected in our country as poker. The upper class knows very little about it. Now and then you find ambassadors who have sort of a general knowledge of the game, but the ignorance of the people is fearful. Why, I have known clergymen, good men, kind-hearted, liberal, sincere, and all that, who did not know the meaning of a "flush". It is enough to make one ashamed of the species." --Mark Twain
• Most poker players agree, having sex is much akin to playing a game - both require a good hand.