10 Random Poker Quotes

• they call it poker because the word "FUCK" was taken.
• i dont play any two suited cards. I play any two non suited cards, that way i am drawing at two different flushes
• Upon entering a cardroom in which a player had never before played, he asked the floorman for a 10-20 hold-em seat. The floorman dutifully put him on the list and told him that the only available seat was at 3-6 Omaha HiLo. The player quipped, "No, I don't have enough money to play limits that high."
• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• All I wanted in my divorce settlement was my computer - Pokerroom.com
• Concentrate. Don't do anything stupid. Catch some cards. ----Mrs. Cloutier, as TJ heads out to another tournament
• Hold em' is like sex... everyone thinks they are great at it, but most people dont know what the hell they are doing.
• God is kind to the underdog! C.A.A
• God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffible game of his own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players, to being involved in an obscure and complex version of poker in a pitch dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a dealer who won't tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time. --Gaiman and Pratchett's "Good Omens"
• I've noticed something funny ... the more I practice, the luckier I get. -- Jack Nicklaus