10 Random Poker Quotes

• you cannot have everything....where would you put it. (steven wright)
• Two cowboys at table. One suddenly plunges a dagger through the hand of the other player, pinning the hand to the table. Then he says to his wounded opponent, "Sir, if that is not an ace of spades hidden beneath your hand, then I owe you an apology."
• "If you want to know what lies on the road ahead, ask the man whos on the way back" anon
• Sign hanging in old time saloon: Liquor in the front, poker in the rear. -The old sage.
• "My luck is so bad, if it were raining pussy, I'd get hit in the head with a dick" -ItalianAce-
• No Limit Hold'em - Hours of boredom followed by moments of sheer terror.
• "It's hard work. Gambling. Playing poker. Don't let anyone tell you different. Think about what it's like sitting at a poker table with people whose only goal is to cut your throat, take your money, and leave you out back talking to yourself about what went wrong inside. That probably sounds harsh. But that's the way it is at the poker table. If you don't believe me, then you're the lamb that's going off to the slaughter." Stu Unger, three-time WSOP Champion
• See AA before the flop is like a smile from the girl of your dreams, see AA lose to a pour hand on the river feels like the same chick just gave you a bad case of blue balls
• "You get your chips your way, I'll get my chips mine." (Phil Ivey, to Howard Lederer)
• "So again, do not raise in No Limit Hold'em -- especially tournaments -- if there is a reasonable chance that a reraise will make you throw up." -- David Sklansky (Tournament Poker for Advanced Players)