10 Random Poker Quotes
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More Random Quotes- If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
- "I thought it was jack's"
- Phil Helmuth Jr. WSOP vs. Jason Lester
- "Hold em is to stud what chess is to checkers." -- Johnny Moss
- when a player asks me for lucky chips, i say they weren't lucky for the person i got them from
- Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
- After taking a beat:
"How bad do they play?...This is the World Series of Poker!"
-Phil Hellmuth Jr.
- No bad beat can withstand the assault of laughter!
- God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffible game of his own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players, to being involved in an obscure and complex version of poker in a pitch dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a dealer who won't tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time. --Gaiman and Pratchett's "Good Omens"
- The greatest feeling is when you've broken your opponent's spirit & crushed his confidence. The fact that you've taken both his bankroll & the shirt off his back is just a bonus.
Tom V. (Livonia, Michigan)
- How can I miss the flop so bad that I don't even have a straight draw? -Jdoe