10 Random Poker Quotes

• I should have stayed home and played with myself.
• I have two small pair.....8's and 8's.
• God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffible game of his own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players, to being involved in an obscure and complex version of poker in a pitch dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a dealer who won't tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time. --Gaiman and Pratchett's "Good Omens"
• If you don't want to get beat on the river, don't get in a hand with me. -- Dan Nelson
• they call it poker because the word "FUCK" was taken.
• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• "If the flop don't fit, you must aquit" -Matt Thornton, Dayton, Ohio
• Remember these three simple words and you'll never go broke........ "Stick em Up!"
• "I already messed this hand up pretty good, so I may as well call." Chris Ferguson
• People who play poker often wear raw hide.