10 Random Poker Quotes
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More Random Quotes- If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
- "I got a full house! Whatchu got, sucker?"
"Gee, does that beat me? All I got is two pair: a pair-a ones...and, uh, ANUDDA pair-a ones."
-Nasta Canasta & Bugs Bunny, "Barbary Coast Bunny"
- "I guess if there weren't luck involved, I'd win every time."
-Phil Hellmuth
- "never count your money when your sitting at the table, there will be time enough for counting, when the dealings done."
- "The poker player learns that sometimes both science and common sense are wrong; that the bumblebee can fly; that, perhaps, one should never trust an expert; that there are more things in heaven and earth than are dreamt of by those with an academic bent."
-- David Mamet
- Homer: Your mother has this crazy idea that gambling is wrong. Even though they say it's okay in the Bible.
Lisa: Really? Where?
Homer: Eh, somewhere in the back.
- Most poker players agree, having sex is much akin to playing a game - both require a good hand.
- Kiddie games down the street! -- mike matusow
- "It's hard work. Gambling. Playing poker. Don't let anyone tell you different. Think about what it's like sitting at a poker table with people whose only goal is to cut your throat, take your money, and leave you out back talking to yourself about what went wrong inside. That probably sounds harsh. But that's the way it is at the poker table. If you don't believe me, then you're the lamb that's going off to the slaughter." Stu Unger, three-time WSOP Champion
- "That's the best I ever misread a hand."
Unknown NL holdem tourney player at Taj Mahal, December 2003, after going all in on the flop, mistakenly believing he had a flush, but rivering a flush anyway