10 Random Poker Quotes

• "First you're a champ, then you're a chimp, then you're a chump." [I was told this was a quote from Phil Hellmuth]
• How do you get a professional poker player off your porch? Pay him for the pizza.
• "Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died." -- Steven Wright
• I've noticed something funny ... the more I practice, the luckier I get. -- Jack Nicklaus
• Most poker players agree, having sex is much akin to playing a game - both require a good hand.
• "Just play every hand, you can't miss them all." -Sammy Farha's reply to, "How does he do it?"
• women can't play poker cause they don't have the nuts
• Famous last words before he became a eunuch 'Id bet my bollocks on this hand'
• Remember these three simple words and you'll never go broke........ "Stick em Up!"
• "Poker is 100% skill, 50% luck" - Phil Hellmuth