10 Random Poker Quotes

• Poker is like petting a cat, you need some hands.
• You know that you've seen a lot of poker when three people are all in before the flop, two of them turn over aces and the other turns over kings, and the king hits on the river, and you say, "I've seen that before, and ...."
• Right now I only play online poker. If I ever play live poker, raise preflop with a good hand, get called by someone with a 52 who hits a straight, I am walking over to that person to knock out his teeth. Congratulations you idiot.
• Play like a cunt, get fucked like one!
• Poker is like sex - everyone thinks that they are the best at it but few actually know what they are doing - Layne Flack
• Frying bacon is much like playing poker; in each, a pig must be slaughtered and consumed by a superior being.
• "I swear to god if you beat me and i will get my gun out of the car and kill you...and your family." -Uncle Remus
• some call cheating immoral, but then again, it's immoral to let a sucker keep his money.
• Famous last words before he became a eunuch 'Id bet my bollocks on this hand'
• "Poker is 100% skill, 50% luck" - Phil Hellmuth