10 Random Poker Quotes

• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• "I guess there's nothing left but all in." -Greg Raymer
• "So, what did you have?" "A pair...of balls."
• Got married to a hand, and discovered I got set up with a she-male.
• Always play hands where both hole cards are different suits. It doubles the possibility of hitting a flush. Anon.
• Concentrate. Don't do anything stupid. Catch some cards. ----Mrs. Cloutier, as TJ heads out to another tournament
• All I wanted in my divorce settlement was my computer - Pokerroom.com
• "I raise, therefore I am." - Howard Lederer
• "Poker is 100% skill, 50% luck" - Phil Hellmuth
• No bad beat can withstand the assault of laughter!