10 Random Poker Quotes

• Right now I only play online poker. If I ever play live poker, raise preflop with a good hand, get called by someone with a 52 who hits a straight, I am walking over to that person to knock out his teeth. Congratulations you idiot.
• Seldom do the lambs slaughter the butcher. -Amarillo Slim
• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• "I got a full house! Whatchu got, sucker?" "Gee, does that beat me? All I got is two pair: a pair-a ones...and, uh, ANUDDA pair-a ones." -Nasta Canasta & Bugs Bunny, "Barbary Coast Bunny"
• Don't challenge strong players, challange weak ones. That's what they're there for. - John Vorhaus, author of Killer Poker
• "There are few things that are so unpardonably neglected in our country as poker. The upper class knows very little about it. Now and then you find ambassadors who have sort of a general knowledge of the game, but the ignorance of the people is fearful. Why, I have known clergymen, good men, kind-hearted, liberal, sincere, and all that, who did not know the meaning of a "flush". It is enough to make one ashamed of the species." --Mark Twain
• "Take my advice and do as you please" - TJ Cloutier
• I've noticed something funny ... the more I practice, the luckier I get. -- Jack Nicklaus
• Fish don't eat Nutz!
• Remember these three simple words and you'll never go broke........ "Stick em Up!"