10 Random Poker Quotes

• I suck, therefore I suck out. North Shore Mike
• With all the new poker players I cant play holdem with a pair of gloves
• "Take my advice and do as you please" - TJ Cloutier
• "Losers always whine about their best. Winners go home and fuck the prom queen."
• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• For all you probability freaks, remember to consider the probability that an opponent is lying. Generally, liars dig holes and keep on lying, at least in the short run, as they try to climb out. Adjust your math prowess accordingly. Tells are paramount, as much or more as your calculating brain is. Poker becomes super-multi-variable when the psychological realm is joined with that already beautiful world of card probabilities. -- a mathematician
• Hold em' is like sex... everyone thinks they are great at it, but most people dont know what the hell they are doing.
• Playing poker for play money is like going to a strip club for the food. -UncleWaldo
• People who play poker should also try playing with sock puppets, or, in a more casual event, training ferrets. I hope this pleases fellow pokerites like it pleases me, daily. WOW im wet.
• I play like a mullet: tight up front and loose in the back.