10 Random Poker Quotes

• Always play hands where both hole cards are different suits. It doubles the possibility of hitting a flush. Anon.
• The one who bets the most wins; cards just break ties.
• Poker - love the pain or play checkers. - MoeSyzslak
• Got married to a hand, and discovered I got set up with a she-male.
• I cried because I had no draw, until I met a man with no pair.
• Liquor up front, poker in the rear
• Poker is like a horse, five letters, two vowels
• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• "I got a full house! Whatchu got, sucker?" "Gee, does that beat me? All I got is two pair: a pair-a ones...and, uh, ANUDDA pair-a ones." -Nasta Canasta & Bugs Bunny, "Barbary Coast Bunny"
• If you play 69, always bet on the come.