10 Random Poker Quotes

• "Losers always whine about their best. Winners go home and fuck the prom queen."
• "Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died." -- Steven Wright
• Life is a gamble at terrible odds if it was a bet you would never take it
• If you play 69, always bet on the come.
• "if you riffle shuffle a standard deck exactly 9 times the cards will return to its original position as it were prior to the 9 riffle shuffles."
• Where's the buffet? -Doyle Brunson
• what is a river if there is no river to draw to water
• Upon entering a cardroom in which a player had never before played, he asked the floorman for a 10-20 hold-em seat. The floorman dutifully put him on the list and told him that the only available seat was at 3-6 Omaha HiLo. The player quipped, "No, I don't have enough money to play limits that high."
• Asked why he played in a game known to be crooked, a player replied, "But it's the only game in town."
• Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. — Steven Wright