10 Random Poker Quotes

• "Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died." -- Steven Wright
• Think of how stupid the average poker player is. By definition, half of them are dumber than that.
• Sometimes doing the right thing loses you money and the wrong thing gains you money. The trick is figuring the right time to do the wrong thing and the wrong time to do the right thing.
• No Limit Hold'em - Hours of boredom followed by moments of sheer terror.
• when a player asks me for lucky chips, i say they weren't lucky for the person i got them from
• "First you're a champ, then you're a chimp, then you're a chump." [I was told this was a quote from Phil Hellmuth]
• i dont play any two suited cards. I play any two non suited cards, that way i am drawing at two different flushes
• "It's always good to get a nice dick-suckin before a tournament...it calms the senses." Alex Powers
• "The poker player learns that sometimes both science and common sense are wrong; that the bumblebee can fly; that, perhaps, one should never trust an expert; that there are more things in heaven and earth than are dreamt of by those with an academic bent." -- David Mamet
• "I guess there's nothing left but all in." -Greg Raymer