10 Random Poker Quotes

• With all the new poker players I cant play holdem with a pair of gloves
• Those eggs smell delicious!
• I play like a mullet: tight up front and loose in the back.
• "Losers always whine about their best. Winners go home and fuck the prom queen."
• Trying to find the odds (not percentage) for this hand. One person has JJ the other 1010. On the flop is J 10 10, what are the odds of this happening?
• "If the flop don't fit, you must aquit" -Matt Thornton, Dayton, Ohio
• I don't really mind getting bad beats. Of course, 9 times out of 10, my superior cards will win. But that 1 time in 10 that someone catches lucky cards and beats me, I don't get mad. Because each of the next 9 times they think they can catch something adds another inch to my television.
• The best thing about that hand was I wasn't in it
• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• Sign hanging in old time saloon: Liquor in the front, poker in the rear. -The old sage.