10 Random Poker Quotes

• Poker is for fat, American losers.
• When I play badly, I lose fast. When I play well, I lose slowly. In a tournament, the net result is the same: I LOSE! - RH 11-6-05
• Nobody would play the game if the best hand always won. -Will Schwarz
• I couldn't bet it, so I gave my Aunt $2 to make a bet for me. She didn't want me to be disappointed by losing my first bet, so she bought a show ticket. The horse won. It's been 40 years, I still havn't spoken to her again. --Gary Carson
• When you're drawing dead, you always get there.
• Sucking out won't help you. The only cure for stupidity is losing. -- The BRICK --
• To win a bit of money, make your opponent think your hand is stronger than it is. To win a lot of money, make him think your hand is weaker than it is. - Josh Avery
• Think of how stupid the median poker player is. By definition, half of them are dumber than that.
• (after a particularly bad beat) "that was a terrible call" "it's called gambling" "no it's called really sucking at life especially poker and trying to throw your money away because your life is useless and you have been pondering suicide for the last week but getting lucky enough to keep it"
• Poker is like petting a cat, you need some hands.