10 Random Poker Quotes

• The best thing about that hand was I wasn't in it
• "Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died." -- Steven Wright
• A great poker player knows when he is playing poorly.
• Never educate a stupid poker player.
• " Dear Lord, help me to break even. I need the money."
• Poker is for fat, American losers.
• Right now I only play online poker. If I ever play live poker, raise preflop with a good hand, get called by someone with a 52 who hits a straight, I am walking over to that person to knock out his teeth. Congratulations you idiot.
• God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffible game of his own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players, to being involved in an obscure and complex version of poker in a pitch dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a dealer who won't tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time. --Gaiman and Pratchett's "Good Omens"
• Take me to the river. Wash me in the water.
• Seldom do the lambs slaughter the butcher. -Amarillo Slim