10 Random Poker Quotes

• There's only one concept to understand in poker: at the end walk out with more money than you walked in with.
• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• Son, when a man bets you that the jack of spades will rise out of the dwck and squirt water in your ear: son, don't take that bet, for, as sure as eggs is eggs, you'll end up with a wet ear.
• Some people ask "what could they possibly call me with" before making a bet. I don't ask that question. I just make the bet and let them supply the answer. - Action Bob
• "I want him to think that I am pondering a call, but all I'm really thinkin about it Vegas and the fuckin' Mirage." - Mike McDermott (Rounders, 1998)
• "You will show your poker greatness by the hands you fold, not the hands you play." -Dan Reed
• If it wasn't for luck, I'd win every hand.
• "I raise, therefore I am." - Howard Lederer
• "The last time I saw this many Bad Hands was the Shoplifter's Convention in Vegas!" by flintsword
• "You get your chips your way, I'll get my chips mine." (Phil Ivey, to Howard Lederer)