10 Random Poker Quotes

• I have two small pair.....8's and 8's.
• "There are few things that are so unpardonably neglected in our country as poker. The upper class knows very little about it. Now and then you find ambassadors who have sort of a general knowledge of the game, but the ignorance of the people is fearful. Why, I have known clergymen, good men, kind-hearted, liberal, sincere, and all that, who did not know the meaning of a "flush". It is enough to make one ashamed of the species." --Mark Twain
• "Never say 'Whoa' to a mud puddle" -- Anonymous $4-to-go NL A-5 Lowball Table, Cameo Club Palo Alto CA, 1977
• Dan: I got the ace too, but I have nothing to kick you with. Ian: Well, you could always take your shoe off.
• If you raise with 72 offsuit, you get to raise when the flops is 7-7-2, ... once in your life. If you fold 72 offsuit, you get the free time to study your opponents or the waitresses and avoid polishing the rail with your sweater ... tough decision!
• "You get your chips your way, I'll get my chips mine." (Phil Ivey, to Howard Lederer)
• women can't play poker cause they don't have the nuts
• "If the flop don't fit, you must aquit" -Matt Thornton, Dayton, Ohio
• Got married to a hand, and discovered I got set up with a she-male.
• Some people ask "what could they possibly call me with" before making a bet. I don't ask that question. I just make the bet and let them supply the answer. - Action Bob