10 Random Poker Quotes

• Poker is for loners.
• Fook the floosh droo!
• If you cant spot the fish in the first ten minutes, you are the fish.
• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• "The poker player learns that sometimes both science and common sense are wrong; that the bumblebee can fly; that, perhaps, one should never trust an expert; that there are more things in heaven and earth than are dreamt of by those with an academic bent." -- David Mamet
• Asked why he played in a game known to be crooked, a player replied, "But it's the only game in town."
• "Never say 'Whoa' to a mud puddle" -- Anonymous $4-to-go NL A-5 Lowball Table, Cameo Club Palo Alto CA, 1977
• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• If only I'd read, "Winning at Internet Poker For Dummies." 'Til now, I never thought I qualified.
• how do you know when simon trumper has just got lucky? a bit of his hair falls out.