10 Random Poker Quotes

• Think of how stupid the average poker player is. By definition, half of them are dumber than that.
• Play like a cunt, get fucked like one!
• "I want him to think that I am pondering a call, but all I'm really thinkin about it Vegas and the fuckin' Mirage." - Mike McDermott (Rounders, 1998)
• If you raise with 72 offsuit, you get to raise when the flops is 7-7-2, ... once in your life. If you fold 72 offsuit, you get the free time to study your opponents or the waitresses and avoid polishing the rail with your sweater ... tough decision!
• "See, in my world - the world of high-stakes gin and poker - we play for cold, hard cash. It's all business, pure and simple. Anyone who thinks cardplaying is a 'game' - I'll show you a loser. Money... M-O-N-E-Y. That's how you measure success. One dollar at a time. One chip at a time. That's how you keep score." Stu Unger
• Most poker players agree, having sex is much akin to playing a game - both require a good hand.
• "Take my advice and do as you please" - TJ Cloutier
• "I better straighten out my game, before I flush all my money down the toilet" - D. Drury
• No Limit Hold'em - Hours of boredom followed by moments of sheer terror.
• "So again, do not raise in No Limit Hold'em -- especially tournaments -- if there is a reasonable chance that a reraise will make you throw up." -- David Sklansky (Tournament Poker for Advanced Players)