10 Random Poker Quotes

• Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. — Steven Wright
• Playing poker for play money is like going to a strip club for the food. -UncleWaldo
• You have to piss with the dick you have
• "Hooks (pair of Jacks) are for Fish. You've got to flop 'em, fold 'em, or fornicate 'em." Johnnie Moss
• I'm a better poker player than I am a player. -RedGrant
• Upon entering a cardroom in which a player had never before played, he asked the floorman for a 10-20 hold-em seat. The floorman dutifully put him on the list and told him that the only available seat was at 3-6 Omaha HiLo. The player quipped, "No, I don't have enough money to play limits that high."
• I cried because I had no draw, until I met a man with no pair.
• "You gotta know when to hold 'em, know when to fold 'em." -Kenny Rogers
• they call it poker because the word "FUCK" was taken.
• If you play 69, always bet on the come.