10 Random Poker Quotes

• "That's the best I ever misread a hand." Unknown NL holdem tourney player at Taj Mahal, December 2003, after going all in on the flop, mistakenly believing he had a flush, but rivering a flush anyway
• People who play poker often wear raw hide.
• Son, when a man bets you that the jack of spades will rise out of the dwck and squirt water in your ear: son, don't take that bet, for, as sure as eggs is eggs, you'll end up with a wet ear.
• How can I miss the flop so bad that I don't even have a straight draw? -Jdoe
• Sometimes doing the right thing loses you money and the wrong thing gains you money. The trick is figuring the right time to do the wrong thing and the wrong time to do the right thing.
• Asked why he played in a game known to be crooked, a player replied, "But it's the only game in town."
• I have two small pair.....8's and 8's.
• Any two cards can lose... and they usually do.
• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• they call it poker because the word "FUCK" was taken.