10 Random Poker Quotes

• i dont play any two suited cards. I play any two non suited cards, that way i am drawing at two different flushes
• I played poker with a real 10 last night, however on a slow night she only charges 5!
• Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. — Steven Wright
• when i folded an A-7 suited under the gun which would've ended up giving me the small end of a mini jackpot, my dad said, "yeah, if i would've driven to Tucson, I would've found that diamond ring. But i don't drive to Tucson."
• "What's the sound of shuffling a single card?" - tidytom
• If there was no luck involved I'd win every time. - Phil Hellmuth
• "The kiddie game is down the street!" - Mike "the Mouth" Matusow
• im going to 2 out you to death
• Dan: I got the ace too, but I have nothing to kick you with. Ian: Well, you could always take your shoe off.
• Please screen your these quotes, most of the crap people submit here don't classify as poker quotes at all, they just express how badly those persons misunderstand the game of poker or how proud they are that they understand elemntry concepts such as "counting outs" or "pot odds", no one cares jerks