10 Random Poker Quotes

• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• "if you riffle shuffle a standard deck exactly 9 times the cards will return to its original position as it were prior to the 9 riffle shuffles."
• "I swear to god if you beat me and i will get my gun out of the car and kill you...and your family." -Uncle Remus
• How can I miss the flop so bad that I don't even have a straight draw? -Jdoe
• "Listen, here's the thing. If you can't spot the sucker in the first half hour at the table, then you ARE the sucker." - Mike McDermott (Rounders, 1998)
• When you win... Rub it in!!! When you lose.. Drink the booze!!!!! Los Altos Dirt Bikers
• Its better to have played and lost then to not have played at all Dick McWatters
• when a player asks me for lucky chips, i say they weren't lucky for the person i got them from
• if u play for the thrill u are ill
• In the game of life, women are the rake. - Worm