10 Random Poker Quotes

• Fold and live to fold again
• "Poker is 100% skill, 50% luck" - Phil Hellmuth
• "So again, do not raise in No Limit Hold'em -- especially tournaments -- if there is a reasonable chance that a reraise will make you throw up." -- David Sklansky (Tournament Poker for Advanced Players)
• How do you get a professional poker player off your porch? Pay him for the pizza.
• "you either live by the river or die by the river" why do i always seem to die
• "Does this look like a man beat by jacks!"-Rounders
• "Losers always whine about their best. Winners go home and fuck the prom queen."
• Upon entering a cardroom in which a player had never before played, he asked the floorman for a 10-20 hold-em seat. The floorman dutifully put him on the list and told him that the only available seat was at 3-6 Omaha HiLo. The player quipped, "No, I don't have enough money to play limits that high."
• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• what is a river if there is no river to draw to water