10 Random Poker Quotes

• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• "So again, do not raise in No Limit Hold'em -- especially tournaments -- if there is a reasonable chance that a reraise will make you throw up." -- David Sklansky (Tournament Poker for Advanced Players)
• when i folded an A-7 suited under the gun which would've ended up giving me the small end of a mini jackpot, my dad said, "yeah, if i would've driven to Tucson, I would've found that diamond ring. But i don't drive to Tucson."
• The only way to win is to play. Unfortunetly, it is also the only way to loose.
• Asked why he played in a game known to be crooked, a player replied, "But it's the only game in town."
• Deal 'em, and read 'em. Ralph Malph
• "Why do you think the same five guys make it to the final table of the World Series of Poker EVERY YEAR? What, are they the luckiest guys in Las Vegas?" - Mike McDermott (Rounders, 1998)
• "Listen, here's the thing. If you can't spot the sucker in the first half hour at the table, then you ARE the sucker." - Mike McDermott, "Rounders"
• "Hooks (pair of Jacks) are for Fish. You've got to flop 'em, fold 'em, or fornicate 'em." Johnnie Moss
• Most of these quotes are abysmal and submitted by the sort of idiots who fill the partypoker chatbox with words like 'phuktard'