10 Random Poker Quotes

• Poker is for loners.
• I have found that when my reasoning for making a call amounts to, "Aww, fuck it." it is usually the wrong move.
• never rub another mans rhubarb, unless he has the nuts - Jack Nicholson
• Deal 'em, and read 'em. Ralph Malph
• " Dear Lord, help me to break even. I need the money."
• "If you want to know what lies on the road ahead, ask the man whos on the way back" anon
• God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffible game of his own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players, to being involved in an obscure and complex version of poker in a pitch dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a dealer who won't tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time. --Gaiman and Pratchett's "Good Omens"
• Two cowboys at table. One suddenly plunges a dagger through the hand of the other player, pinning the hand to the table. Then he says to his wounded opponent, "Sir, if that is not an ace of spades hidden beneath your hand, then I owe you an apology."
• (after a particularly bad beat) "that was a terrible call" "it's called gambling" "no it's called really sucking at life especially poker and trying to throw your money away because your life is useless and you have been pondering suicide for the last week but getting lucky enough to keep it"
• "I want him to think that I am pondering a call, but all I'm really thinkin about it Vegas and the fuckin' Mirage." - Mike McDermott (Rounders, 1998)