10 Random Poker Quotes

• I should have stayed home and played with myself.
• "It's hard work. Gambling. Playing poker. Don't let anyone tell you different. Think about what it's like sitting at a poker table with people whose only goal is to cut your throat, take your money, and leave you out back talking to yourself about what went wrong inside. That probably sounds harsh. But that's the way it is at the poker table. If you don't believe me, then you're the lamb that's going off to the slaughter." --Stu Unger, three-time WSOP Champion
• Never educate a stupid poker player.
• "You can shear a sheep many times; you can skin it only once." -- Amarillo Slim
• I suck, therefore I suck out. North Shore Mike
• God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffible game of his own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players, to being involved in an obscure and complex version of poker in a pitch dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a dealer who won't tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time. --Gaiman and Pratchett's "Good Omens"
• "It's always good to get a nice dick-suckin before a tournament...it calms the senses." Alex Powers
• People who play poker often wear raw hide.
• i dont play any two suited cards. I play any two non suited cards, that way i am drawing at two different flushes
• Please screen your these quotes, most of the crap people submit here don't classify as poker quotes at all, they just express how badly those persons misunderstand the game of poker or how proud they are that they understand elemntry concepts such as "counting outs" or "pot odds", no one cares jerks