10 Random Poker Quotes

• "Losers always whine about their best. Winners go home and fuck the prom queen."
• How can I miss the flop so bad that I don't even have a straight draw? -Jdoe
• Playing poker for play money is like going to a strip club for the food. -UncleWaldo
• "There are few things that are so unpardonably neglected in our country as poker. The upper class knows very little about it. Now and then you find ambassadors who have sort of a general knowledge of the game, but the ignorance of the people is fearful. Why, I have known clergymen, good men, kind-hearted, liberal, sincere, and all that, who did not know the meaning of a "flush". It is enough to make one ashamed of the species." --Mark Twain
• Sometimes doing the right thing loses you money and the wrong thing gains you money. The trick is figuring the right time to do the wrong thing and the wrong time to do the right thing.
• "Percentage players die broke too, Burt." -Fast Eddie Felson "The Hustler"
• "Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died." -- Steven Wright
• The best feeling in the world if flopping the nut straight against two players acting before you who both flopped sets. I'll take my chances against 5 outs.
• I don't want to be called a good loser. A good loser is still a loser. -Stu Unger
• Poker is for fat, American losers.