10 Random Poker Quotes

• All I wanted in my divorce settlement was my computer - Pokerroom.com
• Overhead at a ring game during a tournament when people where discussing there bad beat knock outs etc "Ya I got knocked out of both tournies the same way....I got caught Bluffing"
• I cried because I had no draw, until I met a man with no pair.
• it is true that you may fool all of the people some of the time: you can even fool some of the people all the time: but you can't fool al of the peole all the time. -Abraham Lincoln
• "Poker is just like the fucking universe man, the different combinations and outs are infinite so it's pointless racking your mind about bad beats and shit" Stephen Morris
• Poker is like sex - everyone thinks that they are the best at it but few actually know what they are doing - Layne Flack
• "if you riffle shuffle a standard deck exactly 9 times the cards will return to its original position as it were prior to the 9 riffle shuffles."
• I don't really mind getting bad beats. Of course, 9 times out of 10, my superior cards will win. But that 1 time in 10 that someone catches lucky cards and beats me, I don't get mad. Because each of the next 9 times they think they can catch something adds another inch to my television.
• "I swear to god if you beat me and i will get my gun out of the car and kill you...and your family." -Uncle Remus
• The one who bets the most wins; cards just break ties.