10 Random Poker Quotes
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More Random Quotes- If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
- "What've you got, Layne?"
"You BEAT."
Final table banter between Layne Flack and Mike "The Mouth" Matusow.
$ 6,000 No Limit Hold'em Final Day
2004 Ultimatebet.com Poker Classic
Radisson Aruba Resort & Casino, Palm Beach
- "I got a full house! Whatchu got, sucker?"
"Gee, does that beat me? All I got is two pair: a pair-a ones...and, uh, ANUDDA pair-a ones."
-Nasta Canasta & Bugs Bunny, "Barbary Coast Bunny"
- Two cowboys at table. One suddenly plunges a dagger through the hand of the other player, pinning the hand to the table. Then he says to his wounded opponent, "Sir, if that is not an ace of spades hidden beneath your hand, then I owe you an apology."
- If there was no luck involved I'd win every time. - Phil Hellmuth
- I don't want to be called a good loser. A good loser is still a loser.
-Stu Unger
- "I guess there's nothing left but all in."
-Greg Raymer
- If you cant spot the fish in the first ten minutes, you are the fish.
- Upon entering a cardroom in which a player had never before played, he asked the floorman for a 10-20 hold-em seat. The floorman dutifully put him on the list and told him that the only available seat was at 3-6 Omaha HiLo. The player quipped, "No, I don't have enough money to play limits that high."
- Son, when a man bets you that the jack of spades will rise out of the dwck and squirt water in your ear: son, don't take that bet, for, as sure as eggs is eggs, you'll end up with a wet ear.