10 Random Poker Quotes

• "Does this look like a man beat by jacks!"-Rounders
• Someone on here said that "poker is for fat American losers". That sounds a lot like the ramblings of a foriegn homosexual who's busy scratching a broke ass.
• "Take my advice and do as you please" - TJ Cloutier
• "The last time I saw this many Bad Hands was the Shoplifter's Convention in Vegas!" by flintsword
• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• "Just play every hand, you can't miss them all." -Sammy Farha's reply to, "How does he do it?"
• "That's the best I ever misread a hand." Unknown NL holdem tourney player at Taj Mahal, December 2003, after going all in on the flop, mistakenly believing he had a flush, but rivering a flush anyway
• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• some call cheating immoral, but then again, it's immoral to let a sucker keep his money.
• If you play 69, always bet on the come.