10 Random Poker Quotes

• never rub another mans rhubarb, unless he has the nuts - Jack Nicholson
• If you don't want to get beat on the river, don't get in a hand with me. -- Dan Nelson
• Poker is like petting a cat, you need some hands.
• Deal 'em, and read 'em. Ralph Malph
• If you cant spot the fish in the first ten minutes, you are the fish.
• Frying bacon is much like playing poker; in each, a pig must be slaughtered and consumed by a superior being.
• Overhead at a ring game during a tournament when people where discussing there bad beat knock outs etc "Ya I got knocked out of both tournies the same way....I got caught Bluffing"
• You can't let it get you down when somebody knocks you out of a tournament playing a hand they shouldn't have played. Without these types of players, nobody would win any amount of money, so sometimes you just have to take your medicine. - T.J. Cloutier, Championship Omaha
• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. — Steven Wright